Time….. time management hasn’t been the best for me since I have so much of it now… I feel like when I was more active in the corporate world I managed my time better because I had only so many minutes to spare…..
2019 has been a very interesting self discovery type of year… right now I’m trying to cope with the fact I can’t fix everyone and everything and it’s hurting me because my natural instinct is to fix it….butttttt I can’t fix someone who isn’t happy. I noticed myself getting more and more involved with the guy I really liked. We found ourselves spending every moment we could get and it was taking away from my writing and him studying. We’re both thrill seekers and constantly getting our fix at six flags…. I’m a little upset with the fact that I didn’t write too much this month and I allowed my feelings to play a role in how I approached the situationship. I love hard and it can bite me in the ass sometimes… and it’s hard for me to push away because with my dominant Aries trait sometimes it can takeover and become a mind on its own…. I sit here in bed after having a world-wind week…. My cousin Sydni came to visit La and we were at it nonstop…. Hoover dam, Vegas, 7 magic Mountains, Santa Monica, Venice and Good Burger Popup…. we did a lot and my feet are aching… I don’t feel like leaving the bed today honestly…. days like this I wish I could snuggle up and cuddle with Gerald…. he has nice big arms and I feet comfortably in his arms. I like laying on him watching movies and playing games.
Gerald hit me this week with the I need to get me together notice and I don’t know how to feel. I really care about him and he has been so nice to me these last few months. He is the first guy I dated since the stalker/attacked guy and the first real relationship building since my ex boyfriend Adrian…. I have mixed feelings but I can’t be selfish. The world doesn’t revolve around me. We all aren’t perfect and I have to commend him for being somewhat honest.. delivery not so much but that too is a work in progress… men have hard times communicating…. I think though at the moment I’m going to sulk in the bed watch more Netflix and relax…. tomorrow is a busy busy day… my parents come to visit for the first time Tuesday. I’m excited …. until next post…